The preacher, in his travels
To preach the gospel word,
Has many queer adventures,
That you have never heard.

Jones went in May to Roseland,
The flowers all in bloom,
He heard the brethren singing
A song -- "Hark from the tomb!"

At Balm there was an uproar,
The saints, all out of doors,
Were zealously discussing
The latest baseball scores!

At Jordon 'twas no better,
The din grew higher and higher,
'Twas Philip and the eunuch
That raised the holy ire!

At Zion all was quiet
As the historic mouse,
There was but one old song-book
In that great meeting-house!

At Pisgah ten bold singers
Struck up with zeal and might,
Alas, but one small candle
Shed forth its feeble light!

At Lake there was much water,
Both ponds and creeks were nigh,
But not a drop in pitcher,
And Jones got very dry!

Old Bethel was quite ancient,
The pulpit was no more,
The theme was "The Foundation,"
And Jones fell through the floor!

At Grove, in amen corner,
Br'er Banks, aged sixty-four,
Squirts ponds and pools and puddles
Of amber on the floor!

At Pleasant Hill the brethren
Are all in sweet accord,
And "have begun house-keeping
(They tell Jones) for the Lord."

No cloth upon the table,
In whisky flask the wine,
Corked with a corn-cob stopper,
Now, isn't that too fine!

Br'er Brown, the "leading elder,"
Sans coat or tie or vest,
His broad shirt-collar open,
Displays his hairy breast!

He stands up by the table,
And leads the holy feast,
Upon his chin and whiskers
The brown marks of the beast!

At close, the contribution,
En style, (they make no bones,)
One dime and two big nickels,
They give it all to Jones!

Jones preached ten days at Sardis,
And baptized forty-two,
It was the "grandest meeting"
The brethren ever knew.

They gave Jones three big dollars,
To brace his Christian hope,
And many thanks and praises,
And two good cakes of soap!

And while the meeting lasted
Jones lodged with Deacon Bly,
Where hordes of little brownies
Just sucked his corpus dry!

Ah, those lang-syne adventures,
Back in ye olden time!
And now Jones versifies them
In good old Saxon rhyme!

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